


without baggage, without consciousness (you are weightless)

by chemicalpixie



Series: glory and gore go hand in hand (that's why we're making headlines) [14]
Category: Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Anorexia, Broken Bones, Bulimia, F/M, Italics, SHSL Despair - Freeform, ultimate despair
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 19:51:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7770859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chemicalpixie/pseuds/chemicalpixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“and akane couldn't get junko out of her head, not when every time she pushed away a scrap of food, junko appeared behind her eyelids, <i>knowing</i>.”</p><p>or; akane owari's descent into despair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	without baggage, without consciousness (you are weightless)

akane owari was _young_. she was _young_ and she was _starving_. she had seven younger siblings. she had to feed them before her. she had to. she was _starving_ , and even though she worked, she still didn't always have enough. she would make sure they were okay, if it was the last thing she did. 

//

and she ended up in gymnastics, and it turned out she was good. it was the first thing she'd ever been good at. she made money and she could move her siblings out of the hands of her parents and out of the neighborhood they'd been in for as long as she could remember. and then they recruited her, and she went away. she was devastated, but it was good there. she met people her age, and she had friends, for the first time in her life, but she still missed her siblings. 

//

at the school the food was still so _rich_ and so _good_ and akane was so used to eating so much that she began to throw up the food in the bathroom afterwards. and she threw up again and again and again. it became a daily routine after every meal, rushing to the bathroom to vomit up her meal and scrub her teeth meticulously afterwards. if she scrubbed her teeth enough she could forget her _past_ and her _pain_ and her _tears_. but she could never really get there and all she ever ended up with was _bleeding_ gums. 

//

one day she went after lunch to vomit and she was walking out of the stall when she noticed a girl at the since applying lipstick. the girl said nothing and akane desperately hoped that she hadn't noticed. akane was washing her hands casually, trying to hide the scent of _vomit_ and the toothbrush sticking out of her pocket.  
“so. bulimia?” the girl asked.  
akane froze. “please don't tell anyone.”  
“my name's junko,” the girl said, readjusting one of her pigtails. “it's so very nice to meet you.”

//

and akane knew that junko couldn't have good intentions, not when she refused to answer akane's questions about whether she'd tell anyone. and so akane stopped eating. if she wasn't eating, she couldn't throw up, now could she?

//

and akane couldn't get junko out of her head, not when every time she pushed away a scrap of food, junko appeared behind her eyelids, _knowing_. junko knew, she knew, she knew, she knew. and akane couldn't stop her from knowing or from telling or from doing anything. for the first time since she was a child, starving in the gutter of a city that never gave a _shit_ about her, akane realized that she was utterly _powerless_.

//

on the day the world ends, akane is sitting in a building that's mostly empty. it used to be an office building, she thinks, but what is left of the furniture is shattered into bits. it doesn't bother her. she sits in a corner and listens to the gunshots outside. she tries to eat a bite of the apple she had packed in her bag, but she dry heaves the moment it touches her lips. the apple falls, a bite mark marring the reddish skin. it rolls away, across the floor. akane watches it go. she's never going to _eat_ again. 

//

nekumaru finds her days later, and helps her up. he practically carries her outside, and she blinks in the sunlight. this is the first time she's seen the sun in _days_.  
“would you like to help me beat up some shitheads?” he asks, his eyes _burning_ with _passion_. he loves this, loves the _violence_ and the _blood_ and the _gore_. akane smiles, a _sharp_ and _hungry_ smile that _consumes_ her face.  
“yes.”

//

the boy whines and moans when she hits him. she can't stop smiling. he falls to the ground and she hears his arm snap. it's bent the wrong way. she kicks him in the chest and hears another snap. he's _crying_. akane can't stop grinning. this is everything she needs. she doesn't need _food_. she just needs to hear this _pathetic_ piece of _shit_ cry as she _breaks_ him. 

//

nekumaru waits for her. she is not as fast as she used to be. she is trying her best. she can see her _ribs_. she can see her _bones_. 

//

she wakes one day and nekumaru is gone. she doesn't know where he has gone. she only knows she misses him. she misses his easy laugh, his passion, the way he would lift her if she felt _weak_. she settles back in a corner of a building. she has no reason to leave now. 

//

they come for her long after nekumaru is gone. they have white masks, and she would think they are _angels_ , but she can tell behind the masks they are all _sharp_ corners and _dark_ edges. she wants to fight them. she has to fight them. she _wants_ to. she _has_ to. they will make her _eat_. that's why they have come. they will make her _eat_. she doesn't need to _eat_. she doesn't need to eat she doesn't need to eat _she doesn't she doesn't she doesn't_ -


End file.
